Sometimes life seems so unfair! She should be gearing up for her Senior year, Senior pictures, prom. We should be talking about what she wants to do when she grows up, where she wants to go to college. I should be scolding her from coming home 10 minutes late from a date with the boy I feel is ALL wrong for her...wait, she wouldn't be allowed to date til she was 26 ;) Instead of all of these 'should be' things I had to sit through yet another IEP and be reminded of just how sick she really is. I have to stress out for ANOTHER 2 months and pray/hope/wish for a better MRI and the **icing** on the cake @@@@ I have to file documents with the court to obtain legal guardianship. At times all of this makes me soooo angry I just want to throw my hands up in the air and ask...WHY ME!?!?!?! And then I am reminded..."WHY ME?" I remember back, back when she was just 2 days old. All the lost hope, all the tubes she was hooked up too, the poor prognosis "Your baby has a large tumor in her head. It's like opening a jar of worms, it wraps around every...." I was sooo MAD, so angry at God! I remember screaming "WHY!! Why did you do this to me?!?!" **ME being the key word! And then...and then I got to hold her,...I started crying. Not because I was sad, but because I was soooo HAPPY!! Why me became,THANK YOU GOD...thank you for choosing ME!! And today Mom, I woke up this morning and the first thing I saw was her little face. A gentle reminder that God chose me, ME!! I am sooo thankful for this road, wherever it may lead. I'm learning new things every single day. Some easy lessons, some hard. But with each one...I know, He trusts me and I'm NOT going to let Him down. Soo, good/bad, whatever, I'm ready!! BIG (((((HUGS))))) *****KISSES***** I miss you ya know. I miss your "Things happen for a reason" speech and the hug and smile that always followed! Love you Mom! Happy Valentine's Day =)